Shalom in the home?

Have you heard of this show? It's on TLC. I've seen commercials for it, but aside from the name, it never grabbed my attention. It's aimed at families who are in distress; children who are spoiled, who disrespect themselves and their parents, spouses who are unhappy in their marriage, etc. Because I don't fit into any of those categories, I felt no desire to watch the show.

Well tonight, Ryan is off at his best friends house for a bachelor party and I decided to relax and sift through the Tivo. I came across an episode of Oprah called "Families in Distress" and decided to watch. She had the host of "Shalom in the Home", Rabbi Shmuley, on as a guest to council with these families in distress.

The advice he gave was great and I found myself thinking, "Oh, I hope I remember that when I'm a parent". Of course, I won't, so I got out my pen and paper and started writing.

I've had a few jobs in my life, and some have been really hard. But I KNOW that my most challenging job has yet to come, parenting. I'm unbelievably excited at the thought of being a mother, I've dreamt about it since I was a child, but with that excitement comes a great fear. I fear everything that a parent might fear, disrespect, rebellion, resentment, and just not having a close relationship with my children.

Shmuley addresses how to prevent those situations and how to create a loving and respectful family environment. I thought I'd share some of his thoughts here for you to read if you're interested. The thoughts were taken from his appearance on Oprah and from the 'Shmuleyisms' section on the shows website.

-Put your marriage before your children. As they see a living example of your love and affection, they will learn it. In our society love is a fairytale, seen in movies and on TV. We MUST give our children a living example of it.

-We teach our children sympathy and empathy by making them selfless. Teach them to serve others.

-Don't create insatiability, a cavern that can only be filled with things instead of love.

- You can't be a good parent without being a good spouse.

-Good discipline is just another form of love.

-The greatest gift you can give to your children is the gift of loving each other.

-The man who has a woman who believes in him is impregnable and invincible. Nothing in his life can hurt him because he has peace at this center.

-The hero is not the man who conquers the world, but who conquers his passions.

-By being happily married, we gift to our children the knowledge that love works, that the world is comprised of pieces of a puzzle that ultimately fit. (LOVE THIS ONE)

-The foremost sin in a marriage is to put someone (even your child) before each other.

-Parents today are guilty of believing that they can have healthy children without having a healthy family environment.

-You are not a hero to the world unless you are first and foremost a hero to your children.

I just thought these ideas were really cool. There are many more on the website if you're interested, I just pulled the ones that might specifically apply to me in the future.

Shmuley has also written a few articles (they're listed on the website also). My favorite article was about not being afraid to be yourself and I found it particularly inspiring. It talks about how in this society we are so worried about people not liking the real us that we change and become strangers to try and please others. I'm the girl who is always (and has always been) worried about what other people think about me. This article made me stop and think about that and about how important it is to be ME and not worry about what others think.

Anyway, I thought this Shmuley guy was pretty cool and had a lot of really great things to say.

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Whoa, this is my 99th blog post. I'll try to make #100 somewhat interesting, but life is kinda boring right now, so no promises.